Monday, February 2, 2009

I know, I'm such a Bummer!

You know me, linking to other blogs when I have a spare moment from my kids. I always get myself bawling!!! This is a really sad post so you'd better back out, or grab the tissues.
When my sister passed away my mom told me that she is forever grateful she was able to be a Stay-at-Home-mommie with us when we were little. She told me if she wouldn't have she would have missed out on half of Raechie's life. Who was to know that she was going to be cut short? My mom was able to spend every waking moment (almost) with my little sister and was able to breath in every step Raech took. She was there at every marching band event, every tennis competition, clogging when we were little. spelling bees. There was nothing my parents missed.
Okay where was I going with this.....? Anyways I want that with my babies. I want to be there for everything. We look at our lives and we get down on ourselves and we think we have it so rough!! Well have you ever thought of how lucky we are??? Have you given your babies a love today? Have you picked them up and just sqoze (is that a word?) the life out of them? Mawled them to death with kisses? Went in when they are peacefully asleep and thanked God for them? Have you???
Oh you guys, I had myself crying so hard I thought I was going to throw up. This sweet mother has the most gut wrenching blog. Her sweet baby girl had cancer. Just a little tiny girl of only 2 1/2. So you know I go back through and read her posts, back when little Tuesday was cancer free. If you have babies, you know that they mean everything to you. You'd give up your life in a heartbeat to make sure their little lives would be pain free. They are your WORLD!!!
I guess where I am going with this is I want to enjoy my kids. Actually spend every waking moment with them. Play with them. Smell them. ( I know that sounds creepy but I love the way they smell.) Tickle them. Kiss. Hold. forever love them.
Brody is going to be a year in a couple weeks and I'm still nursing him. You would not believe how some people feel about nursing past a year!!! The gumpsion of people. I know, I know. I was one of them. But that was before I did it. I have loved "OUR" time. Just me and Brody. When I walk into a room after being gone for awhile he crawls over to me and whines. He knows I will nurse him. I can't go without it. It's like a drug. It's like I'm SuperWoman. I'm the only one who can stop his crying!! Yeah for Me!!! I know what you are thinking, and frankly I don't care. I love it. He loves it and guess what folks I will stop when I'm damn good and ready too, yah I said it. I plan to continue to nurse my year old baby. I plan to treasure every moment that boy needs his mommie!
My message to myself is ---- Life is Short. Things could change in an instant. Take every day as if there will not be another. I know we hear it all the time. But then you run into someone's life who really has been effected by tragedy. Her amazing life story is right here. Read it when you have a few minutes and be forever grateful for your life. Your health. Your babies health!!!

7 comments:

Hayley said...

Nurse as long as you need to... until he can say very articulately, "Mom, can I suck on your boob?" Then you should probably stop. CREEPY.

BTW you're a smart***! LOL I will even take pics of that rockin' minivan, just for you.

Bry and Meliss said...

What a great message to everyone Melissa! Thanks for making me realize how incredibly important it is to be a good mom always. You have such a sweet spirit! And your kids are ADORABLE and you are a wonderful mommy to them!

Leesee Girlyfield said...

I am totally with you on wanting to be with my kids every moment of their lives. I am so grateful I don't have to go to work and I can always be there when they need me. Thinking of your sister definitely puts things into perspective. Hope you are doing okay.

Kari said...

You are so real and I love it. You are not fake and pretentious like so many people. I thank God everyday for the chance to be a Mommy and for the opportunity to be home with them. My mom wasn't home with me and I missed out on getting to know my mom...I Won't do that to my kids! Thanks for your posts, they usually make me cry but that's just fine! Crying is theraputic!

The Quintana Family said...

I completely agree with you! I didn't get the chance to stay home with Syd and Dom when they were babies like I have with Tasia, and I feel everyday like I need to make up for that. It's so nice to just be able to watch them, and be there for them anytime they need it. As far as the nursing goes only you know when you and Brody are ready to stop! Don't let anyone tell you that you should. Lots of people nurse past 1. Not only is it a great way to bond, but also less expensive!

Sarah said...

I have a "wake up call" so to speak when coming across people who have lost their babies and it has really opened my eyes. I do not yell anymore. I pick the battles and realize that a broken ______ or something isn't more important than my babies feelings.

Nurse until you're ready. Everyone does it until they feel comfortable. You go girl! And seriously, if you ever want to just vent or bawl, I'm only a phone call away!

Proctor's said...

thank you! i have been really struggling taking care of my kids lately or having the strength to do so. i need to remember why i chose to stay at home and love being here instead of thinking things will get better, i need to find joy now!